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jmaurice2 (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
This guy sucks. Period. Y'all can blow me if you think this is good. Rafael Casal, "Billing them for my rights," that's slam poetry.
writermind (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
Not bad.
A little too fst, too mono-syllabic, too forced.
retrospace19 (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
Its Raw...which is the point, The Narator has created or expreienced the effect of heartbreak, The point is to seem emotionless and raw without poetic representation... As if he simply is spittin' his thoughts and his feelings, Its beyond poetry and is simply raw thought.
aceboggie504 (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
there's no emotion in his voice
laroixhaos (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
i agree. it's as if he's trying to represent a raw understanding that's beyond his caliber to express. his delivery is too one-dimensional for my taste, and it seems like he's trying too hard to 'be deep' without understanding that sometimes less is more.
i think he's got some maturing to do before i'd go out and buy his stuff.
pEnuTButTeRJeLlygUrl (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
Beautiful...forgive me for I am a nube to the world of slam poetry and i can find not fault-so it figures i guess
spamoo (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
I actually gave this piece 2 chances, after like many others not understanding properly the 1st time(quite a big problem if this guy is supposed to be a respected slammer)and paying very careful attention the 2nd time.
He knows how to flow his words together very carefully, but,I lost most of that respect for him at:"love is licking the opening of her vagina everyday" -one of the best examples of "not poetic" ever.
I think I'm not alone in being unimpressed, drifting miles from inspired.
ahmmy2006 (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
i thought it was very good after the backround went away. quite distracting. some pros was the message that he was getting across and the confidence in which he said it. the negs was that he wasn't pronouncing some of the words very well, some were getting mixed with others.
congrats on the win
livyylulubabyy (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
little too fast
thanotron1222 (November 30, 1999 at 12:00 am)
hehe.. me too... |
